155 hours music archive

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As I slid in my Airpods, Spotify’s notifications announced that the sound of The Weeknd’s voice singing Wasted Times had serenaded me for 155 hours. Contrary to its name, Wasted Times gave me a sense of determination of what to do with my time. It was a reminder to dedicate my efforts into meaningful experiences. The song gave me a purpose, and I carried this goal with me while working to the music’s tempo.

The longer I listened to the song, the more the lyrics resonated. The eloquence of The Weeknd’s voice mirrored mine as I publicly advocated for issues I care about deeply. The beat drop early on in the song represents my transition in identity early on in my life. The determination in his voice as he vowed to wait for his lover mirrored that of mine as I promised myself never to give up.

During those 155 hours, I inevitably encountered cycles of self-doubt. From photography to music production and trying out for the volleyball team to playing the violin, I explored my different interests or, as my mother would call it, “went through different phases.” Even after all the “exploration” I had done, I was uncertain of my attributes and talents. These are what people might consider to be “wasted times”, but ironically, they were unwasted. As I participated in World Scholar’s Cup competitions, I discovered my latent love of debate. As I performed with my vocal groups, I ascertained my passion for music and performance. The cold I withstood as the brisk Shanghai wind that blew against my coat while my frozen hands struggled to grasp my camera paid off as it helped me distinguish the artist living inside me. As I relaxed into the soft white pillows laid all over my bed to code and redesign Werner’s Nomenclature of Colors, I established my love for computer coding. However, not all 155 hours were so idyllic. The melancholic melody also reminds me of the consternation I experienced when I discovered the pain of departures, the desolation I felt when I underperformed in competitions, or the sharp pain in my eyes after hours of crying over my defeat in the badminton finals. These were the ups and downs; they were all a part of my experiences and therefore a part of me. I collected every piece, both good and bad, and learned to embrace them fully.

As I take off my Airpods and drop my bags onto the warm, wooden floor of my room, I begin to contemplate my future. While it may seem blurred, I can still scarcely see myself through the gloom. In the successive hours to come, a couch lined with soft white pillows will remain as my sanctuary to code and design more inventive and original projects with music playing in the background all the while.

These 155 hours embody my resilience and multitude of interests. Life is short; while we may periodically crossroads with uncertainty or lose our direction and it might seem like we’re “wasting time,” all of it ultimately leads to individual enlightenment.

Without a doubt, 155 hours will always represent who I was, who I am, and who I will be.

2017

155 HOURS music ARCHIVE

the playlists i spent 155 hours making

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under those lights.

unbound

i loved you when we were young

nø løve

streets.

sänta

如醉如夢

'19

rhythm & blues

overplayed shit

29.

淚。

bab(e)s

my 44th playlist

shanghai.

zenfanya

浮生若夢

summer 2020

tokyo.

thank you, next

i like her but it's a secret

醉生夢死

i think i know what love is now

the second star to the right

channel #155

155.vibes

alison

drive safe

155HOURS

drew

makkonen

i like driving w my windows down in la

my playlist #68

家

olivia

love day?

my playlist #80

cabo wabo taco squid roe

dumar

i have a crush on you but i won't admit it

play this at my wedding

feeling silly, but not silly goofy...

hags 😄

155
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